Another day...
Oh Father in Heaven,
Again, you have blessed me and have allowed me to live for one more day. And what a day it has been. Lord, thank you for that gift of life.
But, Lord, I must admit, I often have a hard time enjoying the life you have given me. It often seems to simply be a long series of sufferings, some sufferings harder to bear than others, but mostly sufferings.
And I recognize that the condition of my life is, from a simple point of view, more comfortable and easier than the lives of many others, such as those who are living in poor nations or those saints who are suffering in jail for the sake of your name. I recognize that you have given me so very much that I do not and cannot deserve. And, Lord, I am thankful for these things, to some extent.
But, Lord, overall, I have a hard time seeing why I should really enjoy this life. I mean, I really can't see how any of this really matters. One day, my life will end, and soon I will be forgotten. Any family I leave behind will also soon go away. Any job I have, anything I did will be but a little ripple in the stream of time, here for a moment and gone the next. Nothing remains...
Nothing except what is done for you. "Only one life, 'Twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last." Oh, how beautiful that truth is! How amazing it is that you are eternal and thus what is done for you is what matters!
And yet, I look at myself, and I cannot help but notice what a failure I continue to be before you, how I fail in being holy as you are holy, how I fail to love others and to love you. Lord, I always get distracted by stupid things, little things, temporal things, even though I recognize that you are important, glorious, and eternal. God, you are amazing beyond belief and comprehension, and these things are shattered in the light of your glory, but I continue to turn to them.
Oh, Lord, please forgive me for all of my failures before you. Forgive me for trying to find satisfaction in the little things of this world and for turning from you.
Please help me to be fruitful for you, to be pleasing to you, despite my weaknesses and failures.
Lord, thank you for the grace that you offer to me, a stubborn sinner completely undeserving of anything from you.
Lord, allow me to also ask this of you: as you help me to not make idols of the things of this world, please help me to find joy in these things properly, as you would have me enjoy them. Help me to enjoy all these things to the glory of you, my God.
Lord, you know all my thoughts, and you know all that I go through. You know how I struggle so hard to try to not find joy in anything in this world. I hear so often that this is wrong, that this is simply the result of Eastern religion, especially Buddhism, influencing me. I hear that you would have me enjoy these things, like TV and games and girls and sexuality and school and friends and whatever else there is under the sun. I hear that all these things are gifts from you.
But, Lord, you know how the tendency of my heart is to try to reject all these things. You know how I would love to be one of these stereotypical monks from the history of the church, giving up all for you. Or perhaps like John the Baptist or one of the other prophets, dedicated only to you.
But, Lord, I know that I am wrong here. Or do I know? Oh, how confusing all of this is!
So, Lord, here I stand before you, undeserving of this spot in your presence, as I am but a failure, a sinner who looks at what he does and sees no reason behind it, and no results. In your body, the church, I'm feel like I'm useless, like an appendix or perhaps the hair on one's toes. Useless. And perhaps a little unsightly and gross, like, oh, iono, stretchmarks.
But now I'm being dumb. Forgive me.
Lord, again, thank you for your grace, and, I pray, please help me to escape this terrible "tediousness of being" and to be fruitful and pleasing to you. May I find joy in this life because i find joy in you.
I pray all of these things in Jesus' name, for Christ's sake,
Amen
Again, you have blessed me and have allowed me to live for one more day. And what a day it has been. Lord, thank you for that gift of life.
But, Lord, I must admit, I often have a hard time enjoying the life you have given me. It often seems to simply be a long series of sufferings, some sufferings harder to bear than others, but mostly sufferings.
And I recognize that the condition of my life is, from a simple point of view, more comfortable and easier than the lives of many others, such as those who are living in poor nations or those saints who are suffering in jail for the sake of your name. I recognize that you have given me so very much that I do not and cannot deserve. And, Lord, I am thankful for these things, to some extent.
But, Lord, overall, I have a hard time seeing why I should really enjoy this life. I mean, I really can't see how any of this really matters. One day, my life will end, and soon I will be forgotten. Any family I leave behind will also soon go away. Any job I have, anything I did will be but a little ripple in the stream of time, here for a moment and gone the next. Nothing remains...
Nothing except what is done for you. "Only one life, 'Twill soon be past, Only what's done for Christ will last." Oh, how beautiful that truth is! How amazing it is that you are eternal and thus what is done for you is what matters!
And yet, I look at myself, and I cannot help but notice what a failure I continue to be before you, how I fail in being holy as you are holy, how I fail to love others and to love you. Lord, I always get distracted by stupid things, little things, temporal things, even though I recognize that you are important, glorious, and eternal. God, you are amazing beyond belief and comprehension, and these things are shattered in the light of your glory, but I continue to turn to them.
Oh, Lord, please forgive me for all of my failures before you. Forgive me for trying to find satisfaction in the little things of this world and for turning from you.
Please help me to be fruitful for you, to be pleasing to you, despite my weaknesses and failures.
Lord, thank you for the grace that you offer to me, a stubborn sinner completely undeserving of anything from you.
Lord, allow me to also ask this of you: as you help me to not make idols of the things of this world, please help me to find joy in these things properly, as you would have me enjoy them. Help me to enjoy all these things to the glory of you, my God.
Lord, you know all my thoughts, and you know all that I go through. You know how I struggle so hard to try to not find joy in anything in this world. I hear so often that this is wrong, that this is simply the result of Eastern religion, especially Buddhism, influencing me. I hear that you would have me enjoy these things, like TV and games and girls and sexuality and school and friends and whatever else there is under the sun. I hear that all these things are gifts from you.
But, Lord, you know how the tendency of my heart is to try to reject all these things. You know how I would love to be one of these stereotypical monks from the history of the church, giving up all for you. Or perhaps like John the Baptist or one of the other prophets, dedicated only to you.
But, Lord, I know that I am wrong here. Or do I know? Oh, how confusing all of this is!
So, Lord, here I stand before you, undeserving of this spot in your presence, as I am but a failure, a sinner who looks at what he does and sees no reason behind it, and no results. In your body, the church, I'm feel like I'm useless, like an appendix or perhaps the hair on one's toes. Useless. And perhaps a little unsightly and gross, like, oh, iono, stretchmarks.
But now I'm being dumb. Forgive me.
Lord, again, thank you for your grace, and, I pray, please help me to escape this terrible "tediousness of being" and to be fruitful and pleasing to you. May I find joy in this life because i find joy in you.
I pray all of these things in Jesus' name, for Christ's sake,
Amen
posted by thebrainkid at 6/09/2005 12:09:00 AM
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