So, I'm up really really late again. But it's interesting, I was flipping through the channels and came across the tele-evangelist Creflo Dollar. He was preaching on lust, and I really feel like what he was saying applies to me.

James 1:14-15
But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then, when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.

So, here's something I learned: The word lust here is the Gk. word "epithumia," meaning "strong desire." Now, epithumia is used 3 times in the Bible in reference to good desires (Luke 22:15, Phil 1:23, and 1 Thess 2:17). But, here, of course, it is in reference to bad desire.

Now, notice the metaphor used here of conception and birth. When lust conceives temptation, it will lead to sin, and sin will lead to death. And conception MUST LEAD to birth, so lust conceiving temptation will inevitably lead to sin.

So, what solution is there? Well, in order to kill the weed of sin, we need to destroy the roots of lust. (I suppose this relates a lot to what i've been reading by Thomas Merton on asceticism.)

And, well, I need help. I really suck at self-control. I mean, I really really suck. So, I am asking for help. Would someone like to be an accountability partner?

I am really tired. And I really need help.

God, please provide me with someone to be an accountability partner. In Jesus' Name, Amen.