meditations - 7/9/05
Meditations
As I have thought about my situation, I believe that my frustrations come from the fact that I want things, and I don't or can't get them. I see enjoyable things all around me, which I desire to attain or posess, and I find that for some of these things I cannot have or attain them. And, in some cases, this desire is not just a mere flicker in my mind; rather, I find that some of these desires are basically hard-wired into my body.
There exist many such desires. For instance, the desire for food when one is hungry, or the desire for sleep when one is thirsty. Indeed, to look at higher desires, I find such desires as the desire to love and be loved by another hard-wired into my brain.
Now, I look at the world around me, and I notice that evil situations exist. Situations such as the starving masses in poorer countries, those who suffer from diseases such as AIDS and whatnot, and those who need clean water to drink. And, of course, there are those who find themselves mentally ill with the mind disease we call romantic love, and who find that their desires to love and to be loved are thwarted by things outside of them.
Of course, these are great evils which must be confronted. But there exists an infinitely greater evil which is often ignored. That evil is this: There are people who hunger for some Bread of Life, who thirst for some Living Water, and who long for Love personified. That is, they long for God. Perhaps they do not know that it is God for whom they long, but still they starve spiritually.
And why do they starve? Because they are prevented from coming to God.
And what is it that prevents them? Well, there lies the most pitiful thing in this entire business, for, you see, it isn't the case that they are held back by something outside of themselves. Rather, they hold themselves back, in their own pride and self-seeking ways.
And that, more than anything else, is tragic. More than the frustration of love. More than the starvation of millions. More than the death of so many in a gruesome genocide, even.
----------------
So, in my own situation, I find myself with desires that are prevented from being fulfilled. What then can I do?
All I can see to do is to overcome my own body, this flesh. To learn to have no regard for myself. To stop seeking the "good" that I see, and to not seek to reach or attain the desires which I have.
I must turn from these things, these evils, and turn to God, and I must learn to seek first his Kingdom and His Righteousness. And, He promises me, all else I need will follow, if only I do that.
I must become humble, like Christ, and submit myself in obedience to God. I must find my joy in Him and him alone, considering all else rubbish for the sake of knowing Jesus Christ my Lord, for whose sake I must lose al things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ, and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith, that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death; in order that I may attain to the resurrection from the dead.
I must turn from my focus on fulfilling hunger, and only eat so that I am equipped to serve God. I must not learn to love sleep, except to the extent that it better enables me to do His Will. And I must overcome the seekings of this heart to find some fulfillment in romantic love, for as I struggle with such things, I am distracted from serving my God.
And what is promised? Well, he promises to me that all my needs will be met.
Now, I do not believe that i can do this. I do not believe I have the power to do all this. But He promises me that his strength is made perfect in my weakness. And in this I hope.
Hope. Where does my hope lie but in the promise that I will see Him and be made like Him? Again, let me repeat: I will see Him and be with Him and will be made like Him!!! I do not and should not expect any good from this fallen, sinful world, where frustrations and distractions abound everywhere.
As I have thought about my situation, I believe that my frustrations come from the fact that I want things, and I don't or can't get them. I see enjoyable things all around me, which I desire to attain or posess, and I find that for some of these things I cannot have or attain them. And, in some cases, this desire is not just a mere flicker in my mind; rather, I find that some of these desires are basically hard-wired into my body.
There exist many such desires. For instance, the desire for food when one is hungry, or the desire for sleep when one is thirsty. Indeed, to look at higher desires, I find such desires as the desire to love and be loved by another hard-wired into my brain.
Now, I look at the world around me, and I notice that evil situations exist. Situations such as the starving masses in poorer countries, those who suffer from diseases such as AIDS and whatnot, and those who need clean water to drink. And, of course, there are those who find themselves mentally ill with the mind disease we call romantic love, and who find that their desires to love and to be loved are thwarted by things outside of them.
Of course, these are great evils which must be confronted. But there exists an infinitely greater evil which is often ignored. That evil is this: There are people who hunger for some Bread of Life, who thirst for some Living Water, and who long for Love personified. That is, they long for God. Perhaps they do not know that it is God for whom they long, but still they starve spiritually.
And why do they starve? Because they are prevented from coming to God.
And what is it that prevents them? Well, there lies the most pitiful thing in this entire business, for, you see, it isn't the case that they are held back by something outside of themselves. Rather, they hold themselves back, in their own pride and self-seeking ways.
And that, more than anything else, is tragic. More than the frustration of love. More than the starvation of millions. More than the death of so many in a gruesome genocide, even.
----------------
So, in my own situation, I find myself with desires that are prevented from being fulfilled. What then can I do?
All I can see to do is to overcome my own body, this flesh. To learn to have no regard for myself. To stop seeking the "good" that I see, and to not seek to reach or attain the desires which I have.
I must turn from these things, these evils, and turn to God, and I must learn to seek first his Kingdom and His Righteousness. And, He promises me, all else I need will follow, if only I do that.
I must become humble, like Christ, and submit myself in obedience to God. I must find my joy in Him and him alone, considering all else rubbish for the sake of knowing Jesus Christ my Lord, for whose sake I must lose al things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ, and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith, that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death; in order that I may attain to the resurrection from the dead.
I must turn from my focus on fulfilling hunger, and only eat so that I am equipped to serve God. I must not learn to love sleep, except to the extent that it better enables me to do His Will. And I must overcome the seekings of this heart to find some fulfillment in romantic love, for as I struggle with such things, I am distracted from serving my God.
And what is promised? Well, he promises to me that all my needs will be met.
Now, I do not believe that i can do this. I do not believe I have the power to do all this. But He promises me that his strength is made perfect in my weakness. And in this I hope.
Hope. Where does my hope lie but in the promise that I will see Him and be made like Him? Again, let me repeat: I will see Him and be with Him and will be made like Him!!! I do not and should not expect any good from this fallen, sinful world, where frustrations and distractions abound everywhere.
posted by thebrainkid at 7/10/2005 10:47:00 PM
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